I'm DYING!!

OMG!!! Hamlet just freakin' stabbed me! All my well planned plans are going to waste and all because I was being nosy! You know everyone has told me that I'm a gossip, and that I shouldn't spy on people and I'm beginning to think that they're right! I'm bleeding so much! How rude of him to do this to me! After all I'm the father of his soon to be bride! I'm going to be his father in law! Wow i'm getting realy faint. O
                                                                                                                                            M
                                                                                                                                               G
                                                                                                                                                   ..................

In the closet

Okay you guys I'm about to go into the queens closet to spy on her and Hamlet, but I  just quickly wanted to come and tell you guys. I'm so excited!! So me and Claudius (I'm calling him Claudius now!!) agreed that Gertrude should let Hamlet know who's boss, and then see what he will say back. I'm pretty sure ther's about to be a big catfight. I'm betting that Hamlet with the added insanity will really yell back, but I wouldn't count the queen out because she acts quiet but everyone knows the quiet ones have all these repressed feelings. AND I heard the queen has an awesome collection of shoes. Women who have good, expensive shoes always know how to be catty. Have you seen the housewife shows? Of course I'm going to tell you all about it! I'm dying to know her shoe size. Oh, and I'll tell you about the fight too. TTYL!!!

the movie

So this play was entertaining. Hamlet and Ophelia were getting pretty close to each other during the play (yay!), but Ophelia gave him the cold shoulder. No doubt she's playing hard to get. That's how you reel him in! I must go to her and find out everything that Hamlet said to her.
 I wonder if the king and queen saw them too. The king got up and left halfway through the play, but I hope he caught a glimpse of them before he left. (I really hope he saw them. How could he not see the sparks flying between them?!) <3 Their marriage will be a great opportunity for me Ophelia. When the king left I went behind him and saw that he went into his room, but I suppose he didn't need me. He never really wants me around anymore. : ( But with Ophelia as Hamlet's wife we would be together all the time. When I listened at the King's door, I heard some things being thrown around. But, alas, I was caught and I had to run back to my seat. If I find out more I will definately tell you guys. Bye!

NO!!

NO! No no no no no no!!!!! Why is this happening to me! Hamlet just broke up with Ophelia! Why? Why!!? This was completely unxpected! and Ophelia didn't even try to save her relationship! Why is she my daughter?! Why can't I have a dughtre who can keep a man?! Hmph! I think i need to go to bed and watch a really good chick flick. And maybe cry a little. All I have ever done is advise, and none of my advice is ever used!!! This is my chance to advance my position and i will let no one stand in my way!! So Ophelia you just need to put on a little lipstick and march your way to wherever Hamlet is! Don't you realize how this will benefit you too!? You would be queen!! QUEEN! Oooo I think I'm getting a headache!